Sunday lunch on the boat

It is really hard to keep up with the save the environment talk when we have so much fun out on the boat. At the same moment that I disparaged anyone who would drive a Hummer, my husband mutters comments about our twin 150's, hmmm. It is hard to be a consumer loving American and still preach to my kids about turning out the lights and recycling. I am sure that there are many families that would make the choice not to own a powerboat, especially with the high gas prices. Is it enough that we are willing to forgo our "tear arounds"? These are basically Lee driving the boat really fast out around the islands off the North Shore while the kids hang out in the front of the boat and laugh into the wind at the high speeds.

We have some of our best days out on the boat. Would we really be able to give that up?

For example, yesterday during a lull in the fishing, while Lee was working on the fishing gear, Teddy complained to me that he was sooo bored. I agreed, that I was also kinda' bored. But then I reviewed the alternative with him - we could be home doing homework, laundry, dishes, fighting with your brother. Instead we were out here together - trapped with your family. Although I know that the boys are still young, I also know that they each increasingly want to call their friends and be away from me. The time when they won't spend the day on the boat with their parents is coming, so we are going to enjoy a little boredom together until then.

Why is it that I can start with this?

Why is that I can spend hundreds of dollars on cookbooks AND cooking magazines at the grocery store and still have nothing to cook?? I watch the food network nearly every night. I love cooking challenge shows - my favorites being Food network Challenge and Top Chef. I can sit on the couch for hours every night and page through pictures and post-it note recipes and discuss ingredients. I can surf the Internet for hours and email recipes home to myself and print out long discussions of how to prepare.

I have even gone so far as to plan menus and add ingredients to the shopping list. I can imagine the dinners that will be served to my family every night. I have occasionally convinced Lee to cook for us and agreed to do the planning and buying...

Except that if you know me for 5 minutes you know that I do not like to cook and then if you know me for 4 more minutes you know that I do not like to shop. Life at Teddy's house is best when I leave the grocery store to Lee. I get impatient at the store.. I had to spend that much money all at once, only to go home and feel like I didn't get what I really needed, or that there is still nothing for dinner.

One reason is that I am so cheap that I often don't buy all the stuff. For example, do you really need fish sauce to make Pad Thai? Do you really need expensive smelly cheese to make fettuccine? Because I think you can get by with stir fry and mozzarella.

hmm... so after all that energy and imagination on gourmet food... this is what Teddy gets for dinner tonight... scrambled eggs and toast... and he had to make it himself....

Teddy's Star Wars Recital

Oversharing

There is a new vocabulary word bouncing around the blogosphere, oversharing.  Oversharing is a blogger that reveals so much of themselves and their loved ones that it causes dysfunction and breakup in their personal life… which of course, leads to more midnight blogging of family secrets.

Some bloggers document their daily life and mundane routines in such a way that there is no need to change the names of the innocent.  For example, the many cute family/workout/diet blogs that I love to read.  Some bloggers change their names and the names of everyone in the blog, my personal favorites are Crabby and Merry from crankyfitness.com.  They reveal only a little of themselves.  Although this year with their move across the country I have learned so much more about them.

My blog really started with Carolyn’s Cure, where I was basically copying my daily journal online.  This worked because my topic was so very focused each day and each experience was new and “newsworthy”.  These days Teddy’s house is just my friendly little quips of stupid suburban family life.   I have thought of actually putting my journal entries up there for all to see (haha – joke’s on me).. except that documenting the painful aspects of raising two boys and working on an 18 year old marriage just seems to be out of place with the best interest of my family.  Maybe my blog is just my space to keep it light and anonymous and merely to document that a boring life is still a life. J

The good, the bad and the ugly

So, because I know that it is healthier to view life from the positive side, I will begin with the good. Good that I made it through a 13.1 mile half marathon road race. Good that I trained and was prepared and good for me that I have achieved a milestone. It feels good to be able to tell people that "I did it".
It feels bad to think about how totally slow and miserable I was. I really have never considered myself a complainer, but omg! - that was really hard. It was hard to be out there alone for so long and it was hard to keep running... I didn't always keep running either... I sometimes walked and that is bad. I am trying to stay focused on the good, on the accomplishment and on having it over with. However, sadly I know that I will have to try this again, because my time was really bad and really slow, even for a slow mama like me.
The race was hot and I have been nervous for days... it was long! I stayed with Suzanne, my fabulous running partner until about mile 7, and then we had to break up. I just couldn't keep up with her. She is insisting that my issues are all in my head and my body was completely prepared to run with her.
The ugly is my toes. Especially ugly is my big toe on my right foot. Interesting because my toes on my left foot have been blistering for a few weeks. I have been keeping my shoes tied fairly loosely so that my toes don't cramp or get stiff and I think that my toe got bruised or something from so much trauma (yes, trauma!)
It has been a few days since the race, and the complete pain of it is fading.. I even went spinning last night. I am not quite ready to put another 13.1 miles on the calendar.. hmm.. but I might.

13.1 Miles - Finished!

My fab hubby ran the last 1/2 mile with me..I was so ready to be done with running - actually I was ready to be done at mile 6 but couldn't find anyone to give me a ride home. He met me at the top of the bridge that is the edge of Boston and leads into the south end - waterfront area. It was nice that all the runners that had finished and were walking to their cars were cheering me on, not for a minute to any make me feel bad about being so slow. Someday when I am faster I will have to make sure that I stay at the race and cheer all those people finishing behind me.. a girl can have a fantasy, right?

So Lee was great, except that he started asking me questions and then I had to gasp at him "I can't talk right now"... so then he kept talking and babbling and then I had to gasp at him again "please no more talking". At this point I really just needed to get to the finish line, which kept getting farther away...

Josh caught a fish at the canal!

 

Have you ever felt this tired?

This couldn't be me!

What the rest of us were doing

when Lee was being the human tractor... well, actually Josh was helping, I just didn't get a chance to take a picture. I was moving dirt from the endless dirt pile at the end of the driveway and Teddy was... well, you can see what Teddy was doing.

Need I say more?

He doesn't need a tractor... this is cross training. I should let everyone know that he did just get back from a 10-miler and it is hot outside..

Tractor fantasy

My dh, Lee is quite a great worker bee around the house. Give him an unscheduled morning and the right tools, and most importantly no access to his boat and he can accomplish much around the house.

It all started last week, when the water cooler talk at work turned to lawn care. I was lamenting the poor state of our grass. Although Lee and I would be thrilled to have a beautiful lawn many thing keep us from that.. time, having no idea what to do, and the hesitation to use chemicals where our kids and dogs play..also - we do not have the proper equipment. Not having the proper equipment is a frequent complaint from Lee at our house. So, we were discussing our lawn woes at work and I mentioned to my friend Bill, that he had two aerators in his garage. My husband had spotted them on a drive by his house earlier in the week...

Friday afternoon when no one was home, Bill dropped off his extra aerator at our house. We not only do not have the proper equipment we also do not have alot of "lawn care knowledge". But, given the aerator was delivered, I figured we should use it. hhhmmm... I study the aerator and I consult with Bill. It turns out that the aerator requires a tractor! what! We do not have a tractor despite my husbands desire to own a large John Deere and many acres. What the heck do we do with this piece of farm equipment??

The final coutdown

10 days left until the big race…my legs are tired today and my 5 miles last night was not great. In fact, I am not sure that I actually made it 5 miles. I ended up at the track at the middle school and there was some sort of running club practicing their sprints. So, I would plod around the track and pretend that I didn’t notice the large group that would engulf me on all sides as they sprinted past. It was a little depressing to be moving so slow and and to feel like an elephant plodding through a dance recital. I stayed focused on my breathing and I had a good podcast on my ipod and I was grateful that I was able to be out running at all.

I am anxious about the next 10 days but very impatient to have this behind me so I can run for fun – OMG – I cannot believe that I actually just said fun and run in the same sentence with “I”….what is happening??

Happy Mothers Day

Shoe burial, good bye smelly sneakers!

After many many years of virtually living in these sneakers all night and day, Teddy was at last able to hold a burial and say good bye to the beloved sneakers.
Don't think however that Teddy was able to part with his shoes because his mother, father, brother, family, friends or strangers pointed out that they were disgusting and smelly and should not be allowed to enter the landfill. Nope, he started limping a few weeks ago.. and it got worse. He tried icing his ankles at night, but would come home every afternoon limping down the street from the bus stop. He refused to believe that his beloved Etnie's - the preferred sneaker of all famous grundge skateboarders could be the source of his trouble. hmmm... I thought that I might try and just throw the sneakers away and deny any knowledge of said lost sneakers. However, I know that Teddy would have to make this transition himself. Something like moving from a crib to the big boy bed. Also, I knew that if I attempted to foist any number of other new sneakers that I had purchased for him over the last 3+ years he would rebel and refuse to go to school without the proper foot covering. After I gently pointed out that he was spotted limping in the outfield at his last baseball game, he agreed to try a different pair of shoes for school the next day. Actually, that was all it took.. he flew down the street the next day. His feet as happy as baby birds who have finally mastered the sky! Then, on trash day we solemnly held the burial. You can see how sincerly sad his brother is.. trying hard not to smirk. Or maybe they are both laughing at me because I insisted that we document the shoe burial with photos. Josh did make an excellent point when he asked about the etiquette of picture taking at funerals...

My morning as Tony Soprano

Look at the ducks that were swimming in the pool this morning. I reinacted the Tony Soprano love affair with his birds. Mine were not as pretty, and they also flew away when the puppy went a little crazy and tried to jump the fence and get them. I managed to take some pictures and watch them enjoy the water. Then, ala Tony, I kept looking out the kitchen window, waiting for them to return...
PS - also about birds - our robins' eggs hatched this weekend and we have three little birds in the azalea bush by the garage. I will try and take a picure of them this week. I had to blockade the end of the bush to try and keep that puppy from jumping up to get them.

Gypsy Jo

Baseball and more baseball

So, other than having only 20 days until the half marathon, my life has been completely about baseball. For me that means keeping the car packed with snacks and water and chairs. I also have to keep track of who is playing at what field and at what time and do I need to remember to pick up anyone else in the car pool? I realized last night as I sat at yet another game that I had been at the same field 5 nights in a row! I think that during the busy sports weeks I just get on auto pilot and each day kinda’ blurs with the rest – once the routine is set I cannot afford to vary from it or I will risk losing my sanity and the very careful balance within the house.

So, with all that going on, when am I possibly going to be able to gear up and get those final long runs in? Honestly, I have no idea. Lee and I have a wedding on Friday afternoon – what a silly time to get married. I am looking forward to a nice night out with the hubby and having a fun party to go to, but I need to run 5 miles on Friday.. and don’t think I could run to the wedding and change my clothes in the car as I have been known to do…

I am starting to actually look forward to the race… no silly – not because I am excited to run 13.2 miles, I am excited to have my life back. I am excited to not feel the pressure of a training schedule and I am excited to run when I want to and skip a day when I want to, and not feel panicked that it will ruin me on race day…only 20 days and about 100 miles left, yikes!

213 miles and 27 days left

Holy carp – only 27 days left until I attempt the longest run of my life – the half marathon! It took weeks of discussion with S until I would actually register. The commitment, not only to the run but that I would run with S is daunting. Strangely however.. as it gets closer I am more and more prepared. I know that I will certainly not be fast and that I will struggle and be miserable until the end, however, I am beginning more sure that I am actually going to be able to “go the distance”.

I added up all the miles that I have run since 1/1/08 – 213 miles year to date. Yes, I am keeping a running journal, my new substitute for years of obsessive food journaling. There is so much satisfaction in looking back on the pages and seeing the numbers going up. For example, on January 6 I wrote “5 miles to the high school –omg”… and yesterday I ran to the high school … and then I ran home! omg! What a great feeling!

Teddy at the Chase the Gorilla down Argilla Road 5k

 

 

How to stay young

I just entered an online contest to win a bike.. I am already dreaming about where I am going to store my new bike and how great my first triathalon is going to be with me on my new bike.  I will not have to ride the old sears bike that is in the shed with 2 flat tires.  And I will not have to ride the company bike that I frequently borrow but then I feel guilty because the bikes are for the employees and I should certainly be able to go get my own bike instead of stealing the bike out of the company cafeteria.

Anyway, to enter the contest you had to write a few sentences on how to stay young.  Of course, I immediately thought of food and all of my “food preaching” that I so enjoy – no plastics in the microwave, no plastic water bottles, local organic produce, no lunchables or sugar cereal (sorry Josh). Except that when I read the other entries I realized that everyone was basically preaching the same sermon – the contest is of course on a health food site.

Hmmm… what do I do to feel good (younger) that is different?  Well, honestly if there is one lesson to be learned from getting cancer it is that you really do find out who your friends are.  Without friends, you will not stay young.  Everyone needs at least one person, and preferable 5 or 6, to call at all times of the day or night and repeat the same tragic or funny or pitiful story to.  I am lucky enough to have a husband who can always be counted on, unless of course the story is about him and then I can call my sister who is always available to provide enough therapy that I am pretty much guaranteed to stay young forever. 

Except for right now I can’t call her because she is writing her paper.. and no phone calls can be accepted on paper writing days – I have to wait for her to call me, which is a bummer when I really need to talk.

I also have a circle of 4-5 other good good friends and I can almost always find at least 2 or 3 of them to tell my story of the day to.  Of course, I call them so that I can hear their story of the day also. So, unlike vegetables that you eat and feel young and then move on, friends are a renewable resource. You can replenish the friendship every day with a walk or a phone call – or if it’s my sister, you can call 10 times in one day and it would be fine.

I am going to look really young talking on the phone on my new bike J

words from the wedding

As you know I went to a huge wedding this weekend and unexpectedly heard a really good sermon. The ceremony was Christian with a reading from Mary Baker Eddy and the minister was Christian Science. He emphasized the importance of support from friends and family. He also spoke about a “vocabulary lesson” for marriage. Here is what he said were the most important words for a successful marriage,

6 words- “I am sorry, I was wrong”

5 words- “You do that very well”

4 words- “What do you think?”

3 words- “I love you”

2 words- “Thank you”

1 word- “We”

The more I think about these words and phrases the more I am struck by how true they are and how there is very little else to say if you can learn to say these honestly and with love. I continue to be amazed at how much I love my husband after 18+ years and how we really are having the best years of our marriage right now. I am so glad that we were able to get through the really nasty years when the kids were young and I hope that we can stay strong through the teenage years ahead of us.

I'm back from Florida

And below are some of the pictures. They did not come out very well, they were from my camera phone and then emailed directly to the blog – which I think is very cool! So, we had such a successful weekend all around, here are the highlights;

Lee and I had a really good time together – a great “couples” weekend

The boys had a really good time without us – both had sleepovers with good friends and then had fun with Cheri

Jules was beautiful and really really feeling good – it was great to see her!

Seeing all my cousins, many that I haven’t seen in many many years, it was nice to catch up and I really like them,

Hanging out with the sibs – Susie and John and Rae – was terrific

I will add some details later, but here it is April 14 and I still have some filings to do!

at the Breakers Hotel bar

Banyon tree at the Royal Poiciana Chapel

The coconut, before I picked it and brought it home!

Why I Tri

I will never know why I got cancer. I was the first of my friends to receive this awful diagnosis. Sadly, I will not be the last. My fortieth year was going to be my best year ever! I was slowly losing those stubborn last 10 pounds. My husband of 16 years and I celebrated my birthday in style, in the Bahamas. That summer, instead of feeling great I kept feeling tired and lousy. I was diagnosed at the end of August and immediately had surgery and 33 days of radiation. I stayed active throughout that time, doing yoga, acupuncture, walking and even a little swimming to keep myself positive. My purpose every day was to keep my body focused on fighting the cancer.
It took six months for me to relax into my new post-cancer life. Nearly one year later I ran my first mile, very slowly. I am lucky enough to have many strong friends around me and a running partner that continues to run longer and stronger with me each week. We started with walking and then running a single mile and advanced to a 10k and now have a half marathon on our calendars.

I have grown stronger in ways that I never imagined. I have become a woman that can enjoy life and take time to celebrate my family and friends and all my blessings. I have become the mom that brings running shoes in the car every day because I never know when my over scheduled life is going to give me an hour to get outside and stretch and run and breathe.

I have also become a gym rat, with my own locker for my swim suit and flip flops. My first step toward riding a bike began with a spin class in the middle of the NE winter. This year for my birthday I’ll be getting a bike.

My body is strong and muscled and that strength has carried through to happiness in all my parts of my life.
So, why do I tri? Actually, I haven’t tried yet, but I know that I will be there on that day in July. I will be ready to celebrate my life and my strength alongside all the other tri-ers. I know that I will continue to look for more races to run and laps to swim and miles to pedal.

Signs of spring

Back in the shoes

and it feels great! I was nervous about running again today and told S that I would have to take it easy. Our half marathon training plans calls for "speed work" and that always makes me laugh nervously. We practically sprinted for 2+ miles, to the corner and back from Suzanne's house. The wind was harsh - a recurring theme here - but really the hill up to the tennis courts was not as bad as it has been and that means that my running is improving, a big yippee!
I am really starting to see definite body changes and that is where the exercise addiction starts. I have a only a week until we go to Florida and I will have to be in shorts and I want to feel good!

Day of Rest is over

Actually, two days of rest this week after the fabulous 10 miles on Sunday.  Monday I really needed the rest.  My whole body was tired, partly from the running and partly from the travel and being away from home.  Yesterday was a regular busy day and had no time to think about running, which was nice that I could still rest and not feel bad about it.  S is waiting for me to get back into the schedule with her and I hope hope hope that when I run with her today I will feel stronger from having pushed myself last week.  I am wanting to see some progress in my speed and I need to remember how good the first 6 miles felt on Sunday – that is huge!

 

The New Jersey run

So, looking at the picture below, you can see that I am smiling - I only have 2 hours and 10 miles until I can be "done". Lee, who is not smiling has 26.2 miles and hopefully not too much longer than 4 hours to finish. We won't talk about the incredibly long ride home, which took 6+ hours.
The weekend turned out really fun and we had a good time with Larry and Kitty and Hannah and Lucas. The water park in the hotel was completly cheesy with lots of overweight french fry eating families.. it made me feel powerful over the bad choices going on in American today. The boys ran a 5k with Uncle Larry while Lee and Kitty and I were running and they did great! It is exciting to see their run times improving and see them enjoying the races more (I am not sure that Josh will ever love to run).
I am happy to have this goal behind me - I still can't beleive that I ran 10 miles! My legs are tired and want a rest, but the rest of me is excited at my accomplishment. Next Goal - The Run to Remember 13.1 miles, May 25.... yikes!

Lee and I at the Ocean Drive marathon and 10 mile race start

yummy breakfast!

Me and my peeps at the Marlowe

The run is on!

Notice that I did not say “race”, because I will in fact not be racing.  My goal is to finish and then feel tired and happy about how far I have progressed since starting this “hobby”.  Until I can actually achieve a 10 minute mile I will still officially be a jogger and I have to say that even that feels pretty good.  I looked at the results of the 10 mile run from last year and it looks like if all goes well I will not finish last.  Seriously, I have in fact finished last in 2 out of 5 races this winter and while the races that I completed had a very small field of competitors, someone must be last.  I do not even feel bad about that.  For example, let’s review the Super Sunday 10k that S and I ran in Boston.  It was Superbowl Sunday at 8:30 am and there were only 5 women in our age group and only about 100 runners total.  I was last and I still was able to feel great because it was my best time ever!  I won’t dwell on the details that I kept trying to stop and walk and S bullied me to the finish line, the important thing is really that we were there and not home sitting on the couch eating chicken wings and drinking beer (note that I actually never do that anyway).

A really nice thing about this run is that the 10 mile and the marathon start together and it is a very small race.  I can actually take the bus out to the starting line and wait around with Lee, I am really loking forward to that.  Then of course he will dash off and I will begin my 2 hour plod. J

 

The cancer ghost stays with you

So, this blog really is not about my cancer and related issues, however, once you have cancer and even after you think you are cured, cancer stays with you forever! Here is the story… I went to the dentist this morning to get my regular 6 month teeth cleaning. I do not love the dentist, however I really love my clean teeth. I can relate this loosely to running, I don’t love to run but I love the results. I was in the chair with the napkin on mentally preparing myself for the scraping and the hygienist informed me that I was due for my annual x-ray. Last year I had just finished up with 33 radiation zaps and declined to get the annual x-rays. This year I also declined, the conversation went something like this;

Hygienist “We need to take some x-rays this morning before we start the cleaning”

Carolyn “hmmmm… is there a reason, because I recently had cancer and got a lot of radiation to my head and would prefer to just get the regular cleaning”

Hygienist “well, it is standard procedure to get annual x-rays and you missed last year, so it has been nearly 20 months”

Carolyn “unless there is a reason, I would prefer not to have x-rays”

Hygienist “this is not standard procedure, I will have to get Laurie the office manager”

Carolyn “ok”

Laurie “Carolyn, it is standard procedure to get annual x-rays. We cannot clean your teeth without x-rays”

Carolyn “I have never had any problems with my teeth and I prefer to keep the level of radiation exposure to my head at a minimum, (I am thinking.. just in case I ever have to go through it again) so, I guess I will have to go somewhere else.”

At this point I stand up and take off the dinner napkin. This sounds stronger than I actually felt, because it was very unexpected and I really hate confrontation, but I actually walked out of the dentist office. I guess we have officially broken up because I also called my insurance company to make sure that I was not charged for the appointment.

Just as a way to make things work out, Teddy has an appointment this afternoon with a different dentist and so I will have a chat with the office manager at that dental office and see if perhaps they can be somewhat more flexible and compassionate on the annual x-ray thing… sigh… I was really looking forward to those clean teeth.

spinning spinning spinning

For anyone who has not tried spinning class, it really is something not to be missed. It ranks up there with running on a cold and windy day, you really don’t enjoy it until you are done. I go with my friend C every couple of weeks (she goes a few times a week, and I just can’t keep up). The basic class is a 10 minute warm up on a “flat road” and then 2 or 3 hills, each taking about 8 minutes to climb. Now the trick is not to “cheat” because it is very easy and tempting to cheat. No one is paying attention to you and no one can tell what resistance your wheel is at. I try and keep my eyes closed and to really imagine that I am outside riding alone in the Italian country side or a cross country race, instead of my usual which is riding the bike path with the boys on the way to school.

I am hoping that all this spinning will get my back side ready for bike riding this summer. The triathlon is in July and I think I still have a lot of practicing to do and a lot more miles in the Italian country side until I am ready for that,

That's me!

 

Hilly and challenging

When a race description says this, you should believe it! My incredible family “ran” a 5k race this morning and it was sooo hard! Lee and I played rock-paper-scissors to see who would run with Josh, and I won! Which was good actually, because it gave me an excuse to run slow bc it was a really hard run.. a lot of very steep hills. I also ran home from the store so I could feel like I actually got a little work out. The wind was horrible again yesterday, and that will continue to be my excuse for running so slowly. The 10 mile race is 6 days away and I am starting to lose sleep over it… I am nervous about running that far and nervous to race without my partner, S.

my running kids!

Ugh! waffle making mess

I have a problem with

Waffle makers. I really want to like to do the cooking at home. And I keep trying by way of reading lots of healthy cooking magazines and buying the correct ingredients, but the actually execution seems to be missing. Today I volunteered to make the breakfast waffles using the fresh strawberrys L had purchased earlier in the week. They had to be used quickly. So using the Trader Joes mix and adding my own yummy stuff – wheat germ, rolled oats, yogurt – I made a fantastic waffle batter batch. But, as you can see from the pictures I do not have a very good sense of how a waffle maker works. The waffles tasted good but I made a mess of the waffle maker and the counter and the clean up was not worth it.

It is another cold day today and we are home getting stuff done. Lee is fighting with the leaking toilet and the J is studying hard for a test next week. I am heading out to the mall to buy a dress for the wedding we are attending in April. 400 guests and my sisters and cousins and no kids! Lee and I on an airplane together – alone (and I know that you know what I mean). I love having a vacation to look forward to,

How am I ever gonna' get faster??

The wind today is so crazy that there is just no way I could really run. The temp is not horrible, upper 30’s and the sun in shining in a pleasant Vitamin D kinda’ way. I heard the wind howling all night and dreaded having to run. I am especially anxious about the 10 mile race next weekend (I am going to have to save the definition of race for another blog bc I do not yet race). I was up thinking about how far I need to run this week and what the weather was going to be like in NJ next weekend. I was almost ready to cancel my run with S and of course she will do whatever. I think we both have a little bit of competition between us, we can’t be a wimp and let the other run alone. Anyway, we headed out from her house and I wanted to do at least 7 or 8 and it turns out we actually ran just under 6. A little bit of a bummer and I need to remember to map out where we are going ahead of time so that I can add in some extra loops to keep the mileage up. It felt good and the real trick for me is not to talk to much so that I can keep my breathing steady. My throat is hurting and I am sure that is the cold weather and the terrible wind.

We have a funny adventure with the boys tonight, we are going to the Globetrotters. I will let you know how it is tomorrow,

This is spring?

Rejoice! Today is the first day of spring… huh? No way. Right, spring in NE. It is cold and gray and really nasty outside. The dogs are going crazy because it is so hard for me to take them for a walk on a day like today. They have to stay in the backyard and make do. I am glad that I made plans to spin tonight with C, it takes the pressure off having to run outside or even worse, contemplate the treadmill. A long weekend is coming up. We don’t have many plans, just some things to do here and there.

Sister Sue has been home this week on spring break and it has been great seeing her. She has been all over the place visiting friends from every part of her life. I definitely need to sneak in another trip to Denver,

No snow No!

Was that me that was just yesterday rejoicing at the glorious weather? The sunny day that will soon give way to the lush green spring? UGH I woke up this morning to snow!! I do not like snow and I especially do not like snow in March when I have put away the boots and the boys are already asking if they can wear shorts to school. I am very very glad that I can have a DOR today. Although S is going to try and do some speed work, the training plan calls for 5x400, I am taking the day off to rest after my very aggressive Sunday run and then my two runs yesterday.

I mixed up my food yesterday because I was trying not to eat a salad for lunch and then go for a run a few hours later. So instead I had a ½ pb sandwich and then I was so starving on my ride over to S’s that I ate a yogurt in the car. I can’t tell if my run was any better. I was definitely hungry and tried not to go home and completely pig out. I really missed my usuall salad full of chick peas and sunflower seeds. I am so enjoying my salad today.

I love this warm weather

Haha! I cannot believe that I am happy about 40 degrees! It is cold out, but what great running weather. Today I left work early – this is getting to be a regular Tuesday event, and met S at her house. I was changed into my sneakers and ready to go. The head band seems to be really helping my ear pain problem. So, the training schedule says we need to go 3.5 miles today and actually I think that we ended up closer to 4. It was one of the few runs that I was actually stronger than S. She was struggling with her breathing and as long as I do not have to talk, I can keep moving in a good groove. I also think that we were pretty fast – in a relative kind of way.

When Teddy got home from school he had it in his mind that he needed to start practicing his running. The family is signed up to do a 5k on Sunday (hilly and challenging) and I think that he wants to be able “run by himself”. Somehow he has delusions that he is going to win…

I am still thinking that I will be able to do the 10 mile race next in 2 hours. I would love to set a time goal for the half marathon, but I think that it is too early to tell.

My knee is hurting, more than I am letting on. I only just starting icing and resting it on the off days.

The dreaded winter cold

I am definitely getting the winter cold. I did get up and do a little workout video and some weights in front of the tv. I am still worried about J and I am trying so hard not to say anything critical. He can get put down by everyone else. So from me is going to be only encouragement, which doesn’t mean that I still can’t get mad at him.

S and I have officially started our marathon count down. She has the training schedule and seems pretty adamant about following it, I am not sure how this will fit in to both of our busy schedules. I think we both really look forward to running together and I am sure I would not have come this far without her.

Today we were supposed to run 3 miles and we ended up doing the entire Cedar Street loop which is closer to 4 miles. As always, really slow but it feels soo good when I am done!

I love my Sigg water bottle!

Ski Bradford

Today is the last day of Ski Bradford. I am glad for the break in the schedule but the boys really loved it so much. I chatted the afternoon away. I was especially proud of Josh today, he skied so well! I have a cold coming and today I would not care any less about exercise – I just wanted to get home to bed!

Grrr...

Ginger is leaving, I knew this was going to happen but I hate change. I got up early and did a little weight lifting in front of the morning news. I am trying hard to get a morning routine. It is so hard to get out of bed. Soon the clocks will change and maybe I can start working out and running at night. I ran 4 miles this afternoon before the kids got home – it is cold out. Come on warm weather!

Winter break is over!

Back to school and back to work, I am happy to have the kids back in the routine. Although, we did have an outstanding vacation week. Work is so busy this time of year and it makes the days go fast and feels so productive. Spinning with C tonight and then we had such a fabulous chat. She is truly a great friend, and give me such good advice, thanks C.

100 Day Countdown

Hmm... I am not sure how this all started back in September. I remember that I was attending quite a few football practices with Josh. His practice would go every night (yes, every) from 5:30 - 7. Not really enough time for me to get home and do much and also Teddy often had soccer practice at the same time. I was not yet comfortable with leaving J for too long. Football is such a tough sport and the coaches that he had are such yellers. Anyway, so it began as a way to pass the time - I will take a walk to the library and back. I think I will run to the gas station and back. It slowly built up to nearly every night I was running a mile or two. By the end of the season when it started getting cold I was running 3 -4 miles and looking forward to it. It was at a time in my life when I really needed something new.
So here I am. I just signed up to run a 1/2 marathon with S - in 100 days. Can I do it? yes, I know that I can do it, even if I walk it. How competitive will I be? I know that I do not have a really competitive spirit as far as needing to reach and pass the person in front of me in a race. I also know that partly my goal of running is so that I can eat and still fit into my clothes. I would like to run the entire way.. is that ambitious enough?

Surprise afternoon

On Wednesday's for 6 weeks I am committed to be a chaperone at Ski Bradford - which I actually never really mind. It is a nice time to observe the boys with their peers - something I don't get to see much. The only bad thing is that it is a long time (4+ hours) to sit around the crowded ski lodge. In the past weeks I have snowboarded with J, this week I planned to sneak in a run and packed all my gear... including hat, gloves, and running shoes. At the last minute, I decided that I did not have to go - there were already 5 other moms going and K reassured me that she would help T rent a snowboard - so I ducked out. At first I really did not know if I wanted the afternoon off, but it did turn out to be a lovely quiet afternoon.I went out for my run and forced myself to run the long loop around B school, I was thinking the entire run that I must be going more than 5 miles, it turns out that it was just barely 5 miles and I did have to do a little walking, but I finished in 60 minutes. Slow, but I was alone and it was cold out... I still need to figure out how to speed up my pace. I had a quick hot tub and then sat on the couch for almost 2 hours... at last minute I got up and power cleaned and folded laundry. The dogs were certainly happy that I was home and it was nice to actually spend time in the house, it doesn't happen often enough.

Snowboard manual

I thought that it was going to rain today and cancel skiing, instead it was warm and sunny and I brought Lee's snowboard and J and I went out together for a little. I was proud of myself and I did really well. Despite the long day, I headed out to the Y and did the step-n-sculpt, it was a fabulous class with a lot of drills. I was hoping that it would help me sleep a little better tonight, it didn't....

Post holiday guilt?

New Year's resolution or post holiday guilt, but I went spinnig with Christa tonight. It was a new teacher, Amy, and I really liked her. It feels good to exercise at night and then go home to a quiet house. I really wanted to watch trashy tv tonight, instead I got inundated with election coverage. I guess I will have to get used to that for the next year...I need to find another outlet to get my mind off of work - for times when I can't zone out to the tv...

Yesterday's run

felt soo good that I am completely inspired to run some more.. sadly my ankle hurts. I didn't sleep well, so I got up and did a 20 minute power - lifting routine (Gilad) he is mild and so good for a morning routine. I packed my gym back for all the choices, spinning, treadmill, swim because I don't know what the day is going to be like. I worked hard and got thru my FS at work and then went for a swim. It was not my best but it felt good to be moving. The spin class tonight is full...

Today's run

The weather is getting a little better - it is in the 40's and S and I are talking about a 1/2 marathon this spring...I am scared to commit to that - es specially with trying to train in the winter.We ran 4.8 to the high school and it felt great, I had been nervous about "going 5"...

Bootcamp Michelle

Step n SculptMichelle was a no show- what a disappointment! It was Joan teaching today, who I really like for spinning but not so much for step - es specially when my expectations were set on Michelle.. oh well....

Indoor baseball

Went to strike one today for their first game, it really is fun to watch them out playing, esp because there are no practices, only games. We are completely over scheduled but hopefully we can manage these next few weeks and still keep the homework going...

The longest day

for the next couple of weeks Wednesdays will be es specially hard. Starting with band at 7:10 am until 12, then home to walk the dogs and then Ski Bradford and not home until 6. We had to skip T's basketball - we will have to figure out how to work that in next week..We are all exhausted - too much vacation - but it is a short week.

Happy 2008

Almost a perfect day for me. I slept late and had a really nice breakfast with the boys and then we went on the NY's day resolution fun run - 2 miles. My time - 21 mins, T- 22 mins and J&L finished in 24 minutes - we have come a long way in a year. It was fun! Had a great lunch and then a family trip to Barnes and Nobles and Starbucks.. I love hanging out in bookstores with a coffee. Sadly, L had to leave for DC, hopefully January will see the end of this project. The boys watched a movie and I puttered, a nice family day to start the new year.

Good bye 2007!

I had to work today. I am almost ready to get back into the routine. It was a long drive home in the snow last night, with all the boys sleeping - even the dogs. I got to work and it is nice and quiet. I am feeling so slug like and ready for New Years resolutions and good food to start. We watched "the gods must be crazy" with the boys, I am not sure how much they understand but they loved it and laughed. L and I watched Crash and fell asleep - another exciting year gone!

Josh and Lee after the Reindeer Run

11k on 11/11

Yea! 5+

So, I completely skipped out of work when I should have stayed - I need to stop the work guilt because no one cares. S and I went out to the canal and then did an extra leg down to Cedar st so more than 5 miles and maybe close to 6!! My legs hurt but I am hoping I just need to "wake them up". My diet has been so bad this week, and it is time to get serious - Mexico in 2+ weeks!

Another DOR and lots of candy

It is official - I cannot handle having candy in the house. I keep munching and munching - sugar begets more sugar... this will have to end.Also, I am getting more worried about the race next week, farther than I have ever run yet and I am way behind on any kind of "training schedule".. ,my body is feeling older, not younger!

No exercise again

Halloween is always a little crazy. T&J came right home and got their homework done, and then T went off to friends to trick or treat without adults! he is growing up, despite his wishes to stay little. J and Chip had pizza and we went out - a lot of walking for me , but no time for a real run. with the schedule change I am not sure how the exercise

HH

Happy Halloween.. nothing but candy eating todayugh- the beginning of the wicked holiday eating weeks. I am doing nothing today toward exercise, except walking around with S and eating candy. I am too busy this week to run - argh! I am so tired, it must be from the traveling and eating so much candy - bad bad bad!

Walk

So, I packed my gym bag thinking that it was cold enough to go to the Y during lunch and try out the treadmill, instead I worked through lunch and met AF for a walk. I could not convince her to run. So, I missed the real exercise which will be important if I want to attempt the 11k next week, but I did have a chance to catch up with A- also important.

2.5

ok, i got back from Denver last night and went to bed early. I really felt like a slug all day and thought I was just going to come home and walk the dogs. But, i did end up getting home early enough and it really wasn't that cold out so I wore shorts and a wind breaker and took Lexi with me and to Cedar St and back. I definitely did not push myself, but I felt really good and could have gone further. I might try the treadmill at the gym tomorrow.

World Series

no exercise today except a lot of walking. S and I went out to lunch and to the bookstore, we mutually agreed not to run today. I am disappointed that I did not get more exercise in but I had a really great day - GO RED SOX

Another airplane day

Up early at Susie's house and now trapped on an airplane. I am hoping that the descent back into oxygen will give me some energy to exercise tomorrow. long long airplane day with more bad food and no exercise

in Denver

what a long day, made it last night in time for the game - went out this am for a run and could not make it more than a few blocks before I was out of air. I need to blame it on the altitude so that I won't get depressed about my slowing down. I ended up going a little less than three miles with some walking which isn't at all what my plan was. As always it felt good when I was done. I am going to have to figure out how to run on a treadmill because the running in the cold is not working.

Stuck in airplane

My journey to the world series, skipping work and pretending to feel guilty but not really, except that I am completely bored sitting in the airport. I can actually see where an airport gym would work because it would be so much better than sitting around being a germaphobe. My flight from Denver is delayed and I had decided not to bring my laptop so I don't have much to keep me occupied. I feel ready to run - I need to ice my right foot and massage my ankle tendon.

3+ Much better

What a relief after yesterday's bad feeling run. I had to start out at soccer and help with the U9 (I need a whole separate blog for that!) and then took J to football so with wet shoes and in the dark I tried to see if I could run better. and it feels sooooo much better, I could have kept going and that feels great - my throat hurt at mile1, but I slowed for a minute and practiced better breathing and made it through.. victory!

2.5 Not my best day

I was completely out of sorts today, Lee is out of town and so I did not sleep great and I am trying to figure out the kids and how I am going to get to Denver. Anyway, I snuck into the house - the puppy hears the garage door go up and starts crying - and changed into my shorts and sneakers in the garage and grabbed Lexi to do a quick Cedar St and back before the bus got home... well, I had bad shorts on so my cell phone was not secure and kept falling out of my pants and the dog was still sleepy I think because she was not keeping up with me and it was very windy and my hair kept getting in my face (I really need a headband).. anyway, we did make it to Cedar St, but it was slow and I had to walk a little and the dog kept stopping. I think I just have to remember that every run is not going to be great. After Sunday I was hoping for some real "runners high" oh well, I will try again tomorrow!

In the swim

So, last year before I got sick I had started swimming at the Y pool a few days a week. Like all new exercise routines, it is so intimidating to start the lap swimming. I always felt the other swimmers around me were laughing and not taking me seriously because I can't do a flip turn and I am such a slow swimmer. ... is my stroke correct ... is everyone noticing that I have to stop and fix my goggles every few laps..... my breast stroke is awful on account of my left leg goes crooked in the water.well, last Friday and this Friday I have made it back to the pool! Betsey was there teaching a class so we chatted and I remembered that her daughter had gone off to college and she remembered that I had been sick, so it was really nice to catch up with her.I swam 20 laps the first Friday and 36 today!! It felt sooo great and I could have kept going except that the lap swim moved to the other pool and I was sort of out of sorts at moving and was cold. I went to sit in the sauna. It is amazing how good a few laps and the sauna can feel..

Welcome New Puppy

I did not want a puppy - I know that I have been talking about getting a second dog for a long time, but I never really wanted to got hrough with it, I was having fun surfing the internet and visiting shelters... So, after the skateboard park last week we went by the shelter and they had a lot of puppies from WViginia. It was almost an immediate thing, although L did have to drive home and pick up Lexi to make sure that they would get along. Of course Lexi is soo happy with her new friend. And the puppy - currently named Gypsy - is very good and cute and seems to be fitting into our family very nicely.

Making so many decisions

It seems that I spend a lot of energy trying to work out my schedule, hour by hour what I am going to do in a day. Often I do not do the important things. I still have that tax return that I have been hauling around in my bag for weeks and I just can't seem to get to it.I have no kids after school, but have to get them at 430 and then immeditaly switch it up to high gear and get them dressed and all to practice and I have to help coach. It will be crazy for an hour and I need to be organized. Also, the exercise demon has taken over again and I am starting to obess about the miles and what to do and when to do it. I have to work today, and be at the office for most of the day. I have my swim stuff so I could go do my Friday afternoon laps, I have my running stuff so I could go and treadmill at lunch, or I could go home and run with Lexi.. also that new puppy could use a walk...

Run Run Run

Can you believe that picture?? I ran 6.2 miles.... I only started running six weeks ago and look what I accomplished! It is truly hard to believe. Thanks to WW and C25K, WOW! Also, there is still alot of that exercise obsession in me.The day was so much fun. L's brother and family and mom all came for the weekend which really added a lot of stress in the house and made the race a little different than my expectations, but thank fully it turned out fine and everyone was happy.It was fun to run with M - she is just my fabulous sister and I loved her energy for doing this with me. Even S was fun, she has been so hard to get to know, but I think that the training and the running 6 miles with her was great for both of us.M is ready to pick another race... I need a day of rest

Tufts 10k - running with my girls!

My first 5k - with the family in Denver CO

Are they real brothers?

"Real isn't about how you are made, real is something that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time than you become real".

from The Velveteen Rabbit

Harry Harry Harry

Yes, everything is all about Harry Potter. I finished the Deathly Hallows early this morning. Actually, I woke up early to continue reading, as late last night I did not want to rush the ending in a blurry state. The book was fabulous. I had really forgotton how much I love the series and think JK is pretty incredible. I don't think I am sad that there will be no more HP books, because I have just barely managed to keep the seven straight, but it is definetly a phenom to watch. I would like to join a book club just so that I can discuss the ending and no one around me has gotten there yet. In a few weeks I will have forgotten the finer details of the ending, alas my memory is really bad...

Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you do not have

I still remember my first trip to the beach

I must have been 3 or 4 years old. The car got packed up and at the last minute I jumped in. I was anxious about where we were going and stared out the window the entire ride. I remember the windows being rolled up when we got on the highway and I could no longer stick my head into the wind and feel the breeze.
Once in the parking lot we all rushed out and raced each other down to the water. I didn't even stop to examine the dunes, or investigate the seagulls. The water was so cold and exhilarating, I swam and swam that day, in and out of the waves. Only later did I come away from the shore and felt the sand in between my toes and took in the smell of the ocean. I was happy and tired at the end of the day, as I got back into the car for the journey home. I made three quick circles around my tail and fell asleep in the back, among the towels.

Rant and Rave

I continue to feel so sad and blue..I cannot get out of my funk and I am sure that it is because the rain will just not stop. I know that this winter was supposed to be mild and we had such an easy dec and jan, and yet April is endless. My throat hurts every day, and my mind wants so badly to be exercise and outside walking the dog.. and yet the rain and the cold appear to be here forever. How do people live in the Pacific NW...?

House Husband

So Lee had a vacation day yesterday, I think as a comp. day for having to work all day on Saturday. It worked out well because he was able to come to my Dr. appt with me. He says he wanted to go because he likes to watch when they put the scope up my nose, but I prefer to think he is going with me to be a good supportive husband, and the nose thing is an extra bonus to him. As it turns out, the scope was having a problem, so after Dr S. tried it once he relented and just looked down my throat using the mirror on a stick thing. The appt went well, and I happen to think that my voice is great. Lee and Dr. S were not quite as enthusiatic about the quality of my voice, but it should keep improving. It has only been just over a month since the radiation ended.
Lee was also able to go to lunch at Teddy's school, for bring your parent to lunch day. He actualy enjoyed the speggetii and meatballs on a plastic tray... I'm glad my husband isn't picky about his food..
About an hour after Lee left school and headed to the mall, the school nurse called me at work to let me know that AFTER recess Teddy had come in with a stomach ache... hmmm... The school nurse is terrible in a lot of ways, and I have never really been fond of her. She does nothing to encourage the kids' back to class, nor is she able to tell you on the phone if your kid is really sick or not... so, despite the fact that I had just gotten in to work I had to leave and go pick him up.
I had to remind Teddy and the nurse that the last Lee had come to lunch at school the same thing had happened. Teddy must get some kind of anxiety about his dad, and being at school - he is such a worrier...
He got home and read Calvin and Hobbes on the couch for an hour and annouced that his stomach ache was gone and he was ready to go outside and play.

Parenting Hot Line

Every parent should receive with their child, a free 24 hour hot line phone number that is always staffed with the leading experts on all child issues - not just drugs and bullies, because those are the easy ones and there are a lot of self help books for that. I am talking about the daily problems, the self esteem, -
the being afraid to shoot a basket at basketball practice because I don't know how to shoot and everyone else on the team seems to know already - and how did they find out how to shoot and no one ever told me - I must be stupid and they must be smart ....
or how about the clubs and friendship scrimishes on the play ground - one day you're the president of the club, the next day you're not in the club...
How is a parent supposed to even know what to say, it is hard to give your child advice, be supportive and understanding. I just don't know what to say to them anymore...
Teddy cries at night that he never wants to grow up and he is afraid to get older and he wishes he could stay little and safe forever... in my heart, I wish that he didn't have to grow up either,

Carolyn' s Cure Update

I know that I said I wasn't going to write about me anymore, but I thought I would let my fans know that I am nearly 100% back. My voice is stronger and clearer than it has been in a few years. I do wonder if my hoarse voice has been cancer cells forming for many years..? Anyway, I am talking and talking... and only tired at the end of the day. I had my first head ache and it took me completly by surprise. I realized that it is the first time in many months that I have not taken some kind of pain killer all day. So, no more advil for me.
Also, I ran (and a little walked) three miles at the gym yesterday... it felt great!

Venus Fly Trap

Lee got the kids a venus fly trap, one each, so they could have a pet. I really think he got them for himself, he has been feeding them mosquitoes with great enthusiasm. But like most things that come into this house, I end up being the caretaker. I really enjoyed the guinea pig and I would love to get another one, except that I was the only one that really cared about poor Eliza.

It's funny how invested in the plants I have become. I cut out the directions and have referred to them a number of times. I have even googled Venus fly trap to look for picutres of what they are supposed to look like. So far, our plants do not look very healthy. I will continue to care for them and clip thier leaves when they turn black. Lee will keep feeding them bugs, at least they do not need a college fund.

Write about a keepsake

Frayed, crumpled, and loved.. He calls it "purple" and it has been part of his life for longer than I have. Imagaine that my son's beloved woven blanket, with him since the day he was born in a smoggy Central American city. The blanket heard spanish with him as an infant, long before I was the main stay of his life. And now, purple is not allowed to leave the house, for fear that she (definelty a she) could be lost or ruined.

Holiday Cheer

It's hard to beleive that the holidays are the happiest time of year. I am a stress head with lists everywhere and my brain jumping around so much. THe thought of 3 days of getting together with my family and then a 5 hour drive with crabby kids to spend 3 days with L's family... where is the good cheer? I keep thinking that I will stop drinking, and yet the thought of NY without drinking, is not a good thought. Every time I think that the shopping is done... I buy more stuff, and really pay more -$15 - for shipping on pajamas for the boys, quite ridiculous. and yet I could not have been able to buy those pajamas any earlier. THere is really no way I could make that kind of committment before thanksgiving.
So where is the middle ground and where is the fun part of the holidays. Well, I really am trying to stay positive and not be grouchy... I wish that christmas morning was actually at night, the atmophere is so much better, lights on the tree, gas int eh fireplace and I can drink... way more fun. How does the tradition go that you can open presents at night?