I am running the local Turkey Trot (5 miler) with my neighbor on Thursday and I have been getting more and more nervous about running with a new partner. My friend S is going away and she has been having injury issues, so I needed to find someone new to go to the races with.

My neighbor is fast and competitive and has been running in races for years and years. I know that she will support me no matter how slow I am, but it is going to be hard to be last when I am all alone. (I never mind being last when I am with S)

So, I have been trying to push myself a little harder and get a few miles in at a respectable pace. I remember how hard it was a year ago to run those first few miles without stopping or passing out, and this might be harder. I keep finding myself slowing down and getting back into my old rhythm of 12 minute miles.. not fast enough for Thursday.

I have really focused on what it is that makes running so special. No matter who you are, what you are or what you used to be, the road doesn't judge. When you are running you only have yourself to please and you are alone in the moment.

The jump from running to racing is the jump from running for yourself to running in front of a crowd. I need to keep reminding myself that the road during a race still doesn't care if you are first or last, you are still faster than all the spectators ... you are faster than all the people at home on the couch.

I know that on Thursday morning just the act of leaving my house at 7 am and running for an hour will be badge of respect. That I am healthy for another year is what I will be thankful for.